How to stay independent from your Coach

Two people sitting on desk discussing with some documents in front of them.
Two people sitting on desk discussing with some documents in front of them.

In the previous post, I had been writing about Why you should never depend on your coach. Now let’s take a look what you could do to stay independent of your coach.

There are so many options you have. Let’s list them and then discuss them in more detail.

What you could do to never depend on your coach?

  • Change your Coach frequently
  • Restrict the number of Coaching Sessions
  • Restrict the areas which you talk about in Coaching Sessions
  • Never ask your Coach for an opinion about something
  • Never ask your Coach for a solution

Change Your Coach Frequently

Well, this might be a solution. But when you found a coach and you both really resonate with each other, why would you drop this relationship.

It is still an option to part ways, when you feel you get too dependent on your coach. Before terminating your relationship with your coach, you could try the other options listed below.

Changing your coach frequently has another downside. You have to find a new coach that resonates with you. Your new coach might have a different approach to things, which might make it necessary for you to adjust as well.

Restrict the Number of Coaching Sessions

This option seems to be more favorable to stay independent of your coach. It means to just have a few coaching sessions per month. Between the coaching sessions, you are on your own and take action.

That is actually the way I do 1-on-1 coaching. We may have one or two weekly calls at the beginning and then reduce it to one call per week. Later on we might go to bi-weekly calls. It depends on your needs.

By restricting the number of coaching sessions, you stay in control and still have to be responsible to do what you said you are going to do. Your coach may or may not ask you if you have really done what you committed yourself to do.

Restrict the Areas which you talk about in Coaching Sessions

Yes, your coach does not need to know everything about you, neither about your business. It has nothing to do with distrusting your coach. We all have areas in our business and personal life we do not like to talk about with others.

The less I know as a coach, the more open I am to ask you the right questions. See it this way, the more I know from you and your business, the more I could form an internal judgement because of my own business and personal experiences. This inner judgement of mine will inevitably influence how I will work with you. As a coach, the only thing that counts for me is, that you are moving in the right direction with the questions I ask.

A fantastic coach doesn’t even need to know anything except a little hint about the coaching topic.

Never ask Your Coach for an opinion about something

We all have opinions. A coach is not free of them either. However, it is not a good idea to ask your coach for an opinion about something.

This is because it could have a negative impact on your relationship and the future coaching if your coach is right or wrong. Or worst, you may even act like the coach suggested, and it was wrong. As of my own business experiences from having been an Interim-Manager for Finance & Accounting, I know how narrow the path could be to give someone wrong advice. Not that I had given wrong advice, but it involves to tell the other one the consequences if they take action without translating the advice to their own situation.

The coach is not in your shoes. Thus, any opinion is only based on a partial view and assumptions made by the coach. If you take action and things go wrong, who you are going to blame?

A better idea is to make a coaching topic out of it, thus the coach could help you find your own answer.

Never ask your Coach for a solution

Again, your coach does not live your life. And some coaches even have no idea about how businesses work, as they come from a total different background. That could be an advantage or disadvantage. What it will be for you depends on your coaching topic.

Even for relationship or other conflict situations, it is not a good idea to ask your coach for a solution. Make it a coaching topic for one of your coaching sessions.

Conflict Situations for example could be very complex. You need to know who is in which position and understand the dynamics. There is no way a coach could give you a solution just because you asked once.

A good coach will help you to learn how to deal with such situations yourself.


As you have seen, it is pretty simple to stay in control and to stay independent of your coach.

Most coaches are aware that dependency is not a good thing. Yet, we are all humans and might forget about allowing everyone to use their power at their own will.

There might be even more options for you to avoid becoming dependent on your coach. This list is not intended to be complete. Use your own judgement.

Coaching is worth using it. I don’t say that, because I’m a coach. No, I say this because I experienced the benefits of coaching myself.

I wish you a great coaching experience.

P.S. If you are a business owner or manager and like to know more about how we could work together, book a call to discuss.

By Stephan Szugat

For more Information about Stephan, please read the About Page